Wedding ceremonies differ throughout the world, as every culture has its own traditions and customs. Here in Chicago, we have a mix of many ethno-religious communities, one of many, which we are focusing on in this blog, Indian Christians. Our R.E.M. team was honored to document many Indian Christian weddings throughout the recent years. Their weddings are a fascinating blend of Western and Indian rituals. It's a pleasure to experience these unique customs with our couples and create unforgettable memories for them and their newly combined families.
Engagement
The engagement is the most important pre-wedding event in a Indian Christian wedding. The couple's parents host a party to announce the wedding of their son and daughter.
The rings are blessed by the priest either at the church or at the engagement venue. This ritual symbolizes the betrothal of the girl to the groom. The engagement is generally followed by a courtship period before the actual wedding date is fixed.
Pre-Wedding Rituals
Here are a few pre-wedding rituals depending on the ethnic group of the couple.
Roce ceremony takes place on the eve of the wedding day. It involves the parent's blessing of the bride and groom, who are anointed with roce, a mixture of coconut milk and coconut oil. The ceremony is followed by a roce prayer and then dinner party. the following traditions may differ depending on origins.
Mylanchi Ideal is the beautification of the bride, a ceremony in which henna is put on the bride. Then the bride is given paachoru (cooked rice in coconut milk) from her relatives.
Chantham Chaarthu is beautification of the groom, a ceremony in which the groom is given a ceremonial shave and is given paachoru from his relatives.
Morning Blessings
The big day starts with preparations for the ceremony like for any other wedding couple. The difference is that two rituals are performed individually at bride's and groom's home after which they step out to proceed to the church. The rituals include prayers (sthuthi cholluka) and blessings from the elder members of the family.
The Wedding Ceremony
The essence of the Indian Christian wedding ceremony is very similar to a Roman Catholic mass, with a number of a special components of cultural and religious rituals.
Traditional Indian brides wear an off-white saree, but the most common is a white gown with veil, like western brides.
The groom mostly wears a formal suit with a white shirt. Bridesmaids wear sarees that match the color decor of the wedding.
The groom awaits the bride at the church along with all the other guests. The bride is escorted by her father.
Tying of the Thali
The most important part of the Indian Christian marriage ceremony is the tying of thali (Minnu).
Thali is a leaf shaped pendant with a cross made of seven beads in the center.
The groom places a Thali around the neck of the bride. The knot reflects the stability and permanence of marriage.
For a Christian Indian woman, wearing a Thali is a sign of their marriage.
The Wedding Saree (Manthrokodi)
The saree is given as a gift to the bride from the groom and his family.
It is put over the bride's head as a mantle and reflects the promise of the groom to honor, protect, and provide for his new bride for the rest of their lives.
Rings are also exchanged
Another difference is that the groom does not kiss the bride in church. Kissing in public is sort of taboo in Indian culture. The bridal couple walk down the aisle while the church organ plays the Wedding March.
The Nada Villi
It's a ritualistic cheer given to the bride and groom after they are officially married by the uncles and the male cousins. The nada villi is done three times. A royal umbrella is opened and hoisted in the air during the nada villi.
Photo Session
This is a western tradition to have a mini photo session as a married couple and capture those first moments together as husband and wife. Photos with the bridal party is also common.
Wedding Reception
A grand reception is held to celebrate the wedding. Traditionally, the bride changes into the saree that was given as a gift to the bride during ceremony. For Indian families, the wedding reception begins with a formal blessing by the mother of the groom for the newly wedded couple.
Lighting of the Lamp
The bride and groom light the lamp to symbolize their commitment to keeping the Light of Jesus Christ in their marriage and reflect that light to the world through their newly created family.
Milk Ceremony
The mothers of the bride and groom present the couple with sweet milk as a symbol of blessing and to sweeten the life of their marriage. Also, it symbolizes each mother welcoming their new child into the family with a sign of nourishment.
Besides all these Indian traditions incorporated into the evening program, the newlyweds cut the wedding cake and feed each other, swing into their first dance, listen to speeches plus performances from family and friends.
Afterwards, everyone in invited to join the dance floor and party the night away in celebration.